FROM THE FUNNY BOOK

Over the years when I have read or seen something that tickled my funny bone, I would stick it in my "Funny File." Some I've used as fillers for newsletters I've edited, or when I'd learned something that would be aptly illustrated by one of my funny items, I'd haul it out and share it with someone.

Since Jerry and I are a little goofy about our cats, when I saw this cartoon in the early years of our marriage I thought it looked so much like our bed that I shouldn't just throw it away. It went in the Funny File. And when I saw it today, while I was rummaging around in there seeing what I had saved that might be usable in "HOT COFFEE AND COOL JAZZ" I came upon it. Now you all know our secret; yes, we have always had cats in and on our bed. (But no loud purring or kneading!)


What got me started today on funny things was reading an obituary that just about laid me out on the floor in hysterics. How could this happen? I asked myself. It may be the family didn't know the correct spelling, and then neither did the typesetter (I know there is no such thing anymore but I don't know what present day "typesetters" are called.) If you were one, would you arbitrarily make a change to someone else's obituary? Or you might not even realize it was wrong. And truly there are no proofreaders anymore. However, if any of those options had worked, I would not have had such a good laugh. The name is covered out of kindness to the poor man and his family.

Next, this engagement announcement goes way back into the 1970s. Can you imagine opening the newspaper to find this? After telling all your family and friends to watch for it? I watched for a correction or a retraction; perhaps Trudy wanted to stay real low key about this most embarassing mistake.

In an earlier blog I gave a pretty accurate rundown of my religious proclivities, and I must tell you the prayers offered as indicated in the newspaper article below are definitely not unknown to my ears. I never got into religion this deep but knew plenty of people who did. And I guess what strikes me so funny about it is that at one time, it was almost me! WHEW!

And in my Funny Book I have a collection of jokes that have made me laugh in the past. This one, called David's Parrot, is one of my favorites:

David received a parrot for his birthday. The parrot was fully-grown with a bad attitude and worse vocabulary. Every other word was an expletive. Those that weren't expletives were, to say the least, rude.

David tried hard to change the bird's attitude and was constantly saying polite words, playing soft music, anything he could think of to try to set a good example... nothing worked. He yelled at the bird and the bird yelled back. He shook the bird and the bird just got madder and more
rude.

Finally, in a moment of desperation, David put the parrot in the freezer. For a few moments he heard the bird squawk and kick and scream-- then suddenly there was quiet.

David was afraid that he might have hurt the bird and quickly opened the freezer door. The parrot calmly stepped out onto David's extended arm and said, "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I will endeavor at once to correct my behavior. I
really am truly sorry and beg your forgiveness."

David was astonished at the bird's change in attitude and was about to ask what had made such a dramatic change when the parrot continued, "May I ask what the chicken did?"

So that's it for today. The horrible Santa Ana winds are gone, I don't have to cook dinner tonite, and I started out the day with a good laugh and with you, my friends, hopefully laughing too.